By Peter Kahindi

SOMEONE somewhere at some time decided that June will be Men’s Mental Awareness Month.

I realise that as I advance in age I am beginning to pay more attention to things I was never concerned about a short while ago. 

Why, for instance, does something we live with daily need to have a designated month?

An even older man – I suspect it was the evergreen American actor Morgan Freeman – once questioned why they have a Black History Month but no White History Month. 

Were some of these decisions designed to serve some hidden objectives we know little about? 

But please – let’s not digress.

Men’s Mental Health Month is necessary – almost every month.

Men should pay attention to their mental health every single day. We should treat it with an urgency that matches its seriousness.

Some people appreciate these conversations more when they see some not-so-boring statistics, so here goes:

According to Uganda’s National Planning Authority in the ‘State of Uganda Population Report 2025’ between 2021 and 2024, mental health-related illnesses rose by 71% in Uganda. 

The word “exponential” belongs here more than most other places Ugandans use it.

I happily noted that in that report the Authority came up with several macro recommendations on how to tackle what they considered a very urgent national health issue. 

Whereas the macro interventions are important, I will try to be more micro today.

This morning I chanced upon a WhatsApp status from my brilliant friend Cathy Bagaya. 

In a short video clip, she asked her audience (viewers, we call them these days?), “Have you asked yourself, ‘How am I today?’?” 

That question held me because it made sense to me. Personally.

In my estimation of life, the mind drives the agenda.

Our aspirations, weaknesses, ambitions, hesitations and generally DECISIONS are determined upstairs first, before we take action. Even the slightest motions of your body is an answer to the “instructions from above”.

But, the mind also has a boss; ironically – YOU. 

What we feed our minds determines the instructions that it will issue. 

If “I am not fine” is the answer to Cathy’s question, then the introspection towards solving the problem begins. 

I would inevitably follow this with “What is the problem and what can I do about it?” 

The truth is, there are things within our control and those without, as a lawyer would say. 

This simple and short conversation can be life-changing for a person who is struggling with the complexities and difficulties of life. Shoving everything aside in the hope that a miracle will fix them is futile, and we know it. 

Part of what men need to do this month is to try as much as possible to offer ourselves honest answers to tough mental health questions.

We should be happy that it is now globally recognized that men are in the habit of suffering silently.

We take everything in like a sponge, including the missiles that come our way every single day don’t ever stop. 

In fact, they increase daily.

Away from the pressures of life, a good number of us face work and career challenges, domestic pressures, and the eternal feeling of underachievement especially if we open ourselves up for comparison with our compatriots. 

That is all before we go to social media pages for more mental assaults through the goings-on out there. 

Before we know it, we are generally angry at the boss at work, the client who is delaying payment, at the lecturer, at those we think are progressing faster, at the political leadership, at our relatives who ask for financial intervention, at the school for reminding us about tuition, at the economy, at people overall and AT LIFE! 

But we keep everything to ourselves, because: We are MEN!

This is Sparta!

In his 2023 article titled When Men Suffer in Silently, Mr. Wilson Senyonyi opined that “In most African Societies, mental health remains a topic shrouded in silence and stigma, particularly among men. Traditional gender norms often emphasize stoicism and emotional restraint for men, leading them to suppress their emotions and avoid seeking help when facing mental health challenges.”

We choose to be the “hard guy, hard guy!” but inside, we are falling apart. 

Sharing a challenge with a friend is considered a weakness. Because there is a rule somewhere that ‘Men are supposed to figure it out’. 

Somehow. 

And that is often the biggest challenge, because trust me, bro, not everything can be figured out all by yourself. 

Even the person you look up to as a “complete” man has support systems; you are just not aware of them.

Life is designed in such a way that there is a certain level of dissatisfaction that each one of us has and we are constantly trying to find ways on how to fix things.

As such, some men have learnt to build support systems around themselves in order to deal with challenges as they come. 

These systems can be reliable and RESPONSIBLE friends who are SERIOUS about life. 

Others decide to join associations like golfing, charity organizations that bring like-minded people together, running clubs, gyms, mountain hiking, travelling, and more. 

There are also simpler, less ‘people-y’ and more affordable options like finding a walking/jogging partner for your morning or evening walks in the neighborhood, a book club, or simply joining a prayer cell fellowship.

The point here is, find something to do and hopefully, someone to talk to. 

Talking to someone (professional or not) does take the weight off. 

And not in a bar – that’s our simplest solution. Stop calling it a solution.

Holding everything in, turning away from everything and everyone, or as most of us often do, resorting to heavy drug and alcohol intake does not help.

In fact, some studies have proved that it has the opposite effect – though I can’t cite them here myself.

And if we are struggling with mental health especially in the line of addictions, my unequivocal suggestion is that we should never ever feel shy about opening up to a professional. 

They are here to help, and they do.

So, fellow men: ask yourself “How am I today?”